idiocy

it's official. i have a highly overdeveloped guilt center. i am feeling incredibly guilty about a situation to which i'm not really even beholden. there's this guy i know, in miami, and he wants to come to new york this weekend, as we have friday off.

i have not offered to let him stay with me. because i am not comfortable with the idea of him staying with me. the little instinct center in my head is saying "no! bad bad bad idea!" and i'm fairly certain that this is fucking up his plans.

and i feel awful about it! for no reason! if he wants to come to new york, he should come to new york--it isn't my responsibility. and yet i feel like a tool, because i may be messing up the plans of someone who never got an offer from me. a situation for which i should feel no guilt whatsoever.

there you have it. empirical evidence that i am utterly ridiculous.