binary smalltalk

it's been a hard winter, and spring is not coming anywhere near quickly enough. i sometimes wonder if my inner capacity for clarity is tied up in the changing of the seasons...i invariably feel so dead by the end of the winter, just a husk of what i'm capable of when the sun warms my hands. i wonder if that's because simply making it through the winter (even one as completely puss as this one) takes so much bloody _energy_ that we just run out towards the end. that would certainly make sense for my life--as a transplanted california girl, i suspect that i am, by and large, solar powered. the darkness of winter is not good for me...i frequently think that the bears and basselopes have the right idea with hibernation.

thank heavens the sun is on its way. all it needs to do is grow tall enough to peek over the buildings of lower manhattan and give me a kiss.