you can take the girl...

you can take the girl out of california...

but you can't take the sick dependence on sunlight out of the girl.

i just spent my lunch hour doing exactly, exactly what i should have been doing today. instead of going to my kickboxing class, in its dark and strange subterranean hole, i spent the time in the park. beneath blinding sunlight with a book in one hand, spicy tuna roll in the other, listening to a blues guitarist and his accompanying washboard player while i soaked up a truly prodigious amount of sunshine. it was absolutely a delight.

though i would never peg myself as a sun worshiper (it's very difficult to maintain a deathly pallor when you play that game), i must confess that there is little else with the power to elevate my mood so completely. something about warm skin and warm sandals, fresh grass under your feet, relaxed muscles and toasty hair...well, it's most definitely my cup of tea. if for no other reason than that the sun, unlike every blanket in my home, every jacket in this office, every sweater i wear in an attempt to stave the chill off (shivering girl again), the sun has the capacity to finally pull the winter chill from my bones and return me to the world of the living. and potentially happy. and not stressed.

and i suppose that's the best part. this whole roommate situation, this whole work situation, this whole life of mine has been stressing me out quite a bit. forty minutes with the sun in my hair has done a significant amount to alleviate that. mmmm....nothing like radiation to cure what ails you. alert your local nuclear power council now!

and, alas. however. 'tis so fleeting. back in the office for fifteen whole minutes now, and already my back is tense. and my fingers are starting to shake.

cold or psychosomatic anguish? you be the judge. in the meantime, point me towards the sunblock.

spf 45, please.